Thursday, 22 December 2011

Sexual Fantasies

We thought this comment was particularly interesting. Below are our individual thoughts on the subject. What are your thoughts? Have you ever had a sexual fantasy? Did it come true and, if so, what was it like? Comment about your experience(s) in the comment section below.
"Does having sexual fantasies inhibit the possibility of these scenerios from actually happening (being that the mind categorizes such scenarios as impossible and therefore pursues something else)? Or do fantasies play a role in how humans attain their physical desires?" (comment from Rowdizzle)
#1 Experiment. Role Play. But above all: communicate. In order for sexual fantasies to have any chance of coming true you need to communicate with your partner. Tell your partner what you want, what turns you on. Most people aren't mind readers, so there is no way your partner can fully satisfy you unless they know what you desire and what you need. We need to talk about sex. This isn't just parents talking about it with their kids, or teachers with their students, we should also be communicating with our partners. Couples should talk about what they expect from each other, what they desire, and what they need to keep the fire kindled. Talking about sex and sexual fantasies may be embarrassing but certainly not as embarrassing as getting naked. Besides who knows some of those fantasies might actually come true. As for those really crazy weird ones, while your partner might not be into it, I'm sure they'll respect your honesty and openness.
#2 If someone becomes too fixated on having a fantasy played out, they might stop at nothing to achieve it (imagine serial killers) which I guess means that no fantasy is unachievable as long as you might be willing to compromise. For example, you want to have sex while skydiving. It may not be safe to do that, but you could do it bungee jumping? If you have an astronaut friend, borrow a zero gravity machine? Maybe a hammock, even…? It’s not totally unrealistic. And occasionally, I do find myself heading towards certain situations because I realize that it might make a fantasy come true. I’ll make a point of going out on a date with my significant other during bad weather because I dream of passionately smooching in the pouring rain and flashing lighting. Ultimately, it boils down to the person. Celebrity fantasies are generally just that because the chance of meeting Jude Law or Kate Beckinsale in that hotel room in Vegas are pretty slim, sorry. But others might drive people forwards, to maybe start picking out mates that can one day fulfill their fantasies. Most people never let go of their fantasies, things like role-playing, or bandage. They may never get lived out, but I guarantee you they don’t write it off as never going to happen. It’s like telling a kid they can have ice cream every day if they get straight A’s and the kid goes ”Pffft that’ll never happen.” No, the kid does his homework and tries to get A’s for the ice cream. But maybe they’ll settle for the consolation prize of a freezie.

#3 This is an interesting question and some great food for thought. Sexual fantasies tend (for me anyways) to be scenarios we wish… hope… PRAY (in a perfect world) will come true. But what happens when they do? For instance, what happens if the fantasy enacted doesn’t live up to the hype your mind has created. Does the fantasy become useless and unable to arouse us any longer? Or, what if the fantasy is everything you thought it would be? Does playing out your fantasy perfectly take away the desire for it? Can fantasy ever reality?

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Thank you for your input. The question arouses many interesting possibilities. Further exploration is indeed necessary.